D-Word Series Part 32: The Big One

Play for the Audio Version

            

Yea, I know! Who else out there is like me? Or, maybe physically not like me. Meaning, unlike me you guys are normally in the workforce?

I mean we don't even know what day iis. Doesn't it seem like every day is a weekend since you're not working anymore! Because of this Covid-19 thing? Well, in any case, today is really Saturday. Well, it is for me. I don't know what day it is for you who are reading this. :-) But, again for me, it is Saturday.

I need to remind myself so I don't forget as well. Joe knows even before this covid-19 stuff, I would forget what day it was sometimes. But, I think it's time to dive into today's reading.

Continuing on with the D-Word Series. D-Word Series Part 32: The Big One! And, no, I am not talking about that! Get your mind out of the gutter! I know that I said I am a wife and I have my rights. However. excuse you, ma'am or sir. I'm not talking about that. I am talking about the big one husbands and wives may sometimes get into. You know what I'm talking about. Think about arguing. Think about disagreements. Think about not getting a good night's sleep. And, think about not facing each other. Are you guys kind of getting what I'm trying to get at?

Well, really I suppose this "big one" that I am talking about can really happen anywhere from morning to afternoon to evening. Just depends when it is going to happen.

For this writing I'm going to focus on this happening in the evening.
Particularly before we go to bed.Hey fellow wives. I think I'm going to speak to you gals first. Picture your days like this.

Maybe half of the day goes really well between you and your husband. Maybe, you don't fight at all during that half of the day? Not one peep of disagreement coming out of the mouths of wives right after the husband talks. Husbands might be thinking, yes that would be awesome! Then, their mind would quickly revert back to thinking about who they are married to. And, then they would think, nope oh, that's not my wife! She will argue and argue until....

Anyway, sorry about my little sidetracked. Come on Sam Focus! Let's check out the other half of the day. Let's just say that other half of the day? Not smooth sailing for the two. So to speak. See, that's the difference with my husband and this wife and other husbands and their wives. Meaning this. I can no longer walk.

Husbands and wives, who are still able to walk? If the two get into a heated disagreement, then one of them can easily just walk to another room. They can easily make themselves go on timeout from their spouse. They can separate for a while. They need to separate for a while. Not too far. Maybe just in different rooms.

Now, when it comes to me and my husband? I think we're a special case. Because only one of us can walk. Not I said the fly. Seriously, Joe can easily get up and walk and stay a little bit either in our room, the bathroom, or in the hallway outside.

Yep, I think that's basically it. Well, unless of course, he would want to go outside the door of the condo. However, I don't think he would want to risk bumping into a covid 19 patient that lives here in the same Condo building. As I was saying, yeah you need to separate at times like that. I really do think it's healthy for a marriage.

Pause break. I used to have this friend who would always tell me as if somewhat displaying that it was a good thing, this. She used to tell me about her boyfriend. Mind you, this boyfriend of hers used to be her best friend's boyfriend. Yeah. That's what I said whatever.

She would always tell me that they would never and I mean never get into fights. I know. That's what I was thinking. Did the boyfriend not have a mind of his own? The word wuss or pussy comes to mind. The Man without balls is also what comes to mind.

I don't know about you, other wives. But, I don't think I would want to be with a husband like that. I mean no balls. I mean literally and metaphorically as well. And, I don't think husbands would want to be with a wife who doesn't even have her own mind. Right? I don't know maybe there are husbands out there that would. Everyone's different.

I lost communication with her. So, I have no idea how they are now. I think they have a child. That's what I heard. Anyway, whatever. Anyway, let's get back to the gist of this writing.

Ah yes, the big one! Back to my little scenario. As I was saying, the other half of the day that hubby and wife were fighting like cray cray! Usually, husbands and wives, they can physically walk away from each other for a bit.

Let us fast forward 2 sleeping time. Are you kidding me? Nothing has been resolved from the two's fighting? No apology? I repeat no apology? No hug or kiss goodnight? Folks, believe me I know how that feels. And, it sucks! But, it is what it is. And, what it is does happen sometimes.

I know right? And, I too don't like to go to bed angry. I'm a wife. And, we wives we like to talk ab
alot. We like to talk until we figure out how to fix things. Some of us wives like to follow what the Bible says don't go to bed angry! I don't think it's verbatim. But, it talked about not letting the sun go down or something. I forgot I will include the Bible verse.

Let me end my writing with these Deep Thoughts. Still talking to fellow wives. This is what me and my husband do. Well, what we try to do.

I remember one time we were fighting about something. Don't remember specifics. But, I do remember I did not want to go to bed until the fight was resolved. I didn't understand because Joe would just easily fall asleep even if we didn't fix the fight. Is that the talent that men have? Just kidding. I don't know that. Glady says her husband is the same way like we keep saying Joe and Gustav?Brothers from another mother. LOL

Now let's talk about what we should do. Fellow wives, listen up please. Okay, Joe and I just started doing this. And, who knows maybe this will be helpful to you guys as well. Once we get on the bed to go to sleep for the night, we both would just apologize for anything we did to hurt the person throughout the day. We don't go into specifics, because well for me I know my husband has to get some sleep because he has work the next morning. Then after you apologize make sure to tell your husband you love him. Remember trust your husband's heart. Whatever he did to hurt you all day he did not mean to. Do you have a good willed husband? Trust his heart.

Pause break. I know my husband told me one time there's a reason you hurt me was because I hurt him. Fellow husbands and wives if that was ever the case then both of you need to talk to each other and tell each other what you did to hurt them. So then you can apologize! That's it!

The last thing me and my husband make sure to be doing before we sleep is this. We are holding each other's hand. What do you think? That seems doable right? Then the next morning, sometimes actually most times because our fights are usually stupid. We end up forgetting about the whole thing. The following day, when we wake up it's a new day! Both of our slates are clean. We both apologized and then now we needed to forgive and
Forget

James 1:20

For the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.

Ephesians 4:26-27


Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and give no opportunity to the devil.

Proverbs 15:1 ESV / 12 :1

A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger